Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Baby Girl P - Update

First - a little catch up - I told you Monday that we found out we are having ONE baby GIRL! I only wanted to have one ultrasound originally. Well, to date, we have had 3. The first one was to determine how many babies were in there. The second was our standard "viability" ultrasound. 

At our ultrasound our tech asked if I had any caffeine that day. I had, but it made me curious why she had asked. I was on a bit of high alert since just weeks before Tommy died. Well I started to notice her heartbeat was slowing down a bit then it would pick back up. I got really anxious and after a while the tech asked another tech to come in and give me a second opinion. They both agreed that it was normal. If they had seen something in the ultrasound I wouldn't be able to leave that day without talking to a doctor. 

Well 2 or so weeks later we had our monthly midwife appointment. At the appointment the midwife told us our baby had a fetal cardiac arrhythmia and laid out a plan. The plan was for me to come in every week for 2 weeks have have her heart listened to for 1 minute and they had a fetal echocardiogram scheduled in 2 weeks. If her heart rate spiked during the check ups I would have to go immediately to the hospital for further testing.  That day at the office she passed her heart test. 

The next week we had a heart rate test and she passed with flying colors. I was feeling so confident and I wasn't worried about anything. The next week I almost told Philip not to come because I was sure everything was perfect. About 30 seconds into the test the midwife (whom I had never seen before) said "I am going to send you to the hospital" My heart dropped into my stomach and I started panicking. She said her heart rate had dipped twice in 1 minute. Once to 88 and once to 105. 

She said based on what she heard they would send me directly to triage and I would probably be admitted. After she walked out of the room to call the hospital the tears came. Philip grabbed my hand and prayed with me. After the midwife came back in she told me that the high risk doctor at the hospital didn't think I needed to go in right then, since I already had my echocardiogram scheduled for the next day. She told me I needed to remain calm. Right. An already anxiety stricken, family trauma, and first time mom - that's the makings of a cool/ calm/ collected woman. 

All night I went back and forth between calm, panic, confidence, and worst case scenarios. The next morning at 8:40 AM we had our echo. After 2.5 hours, countless questions, and "are you sure's?" our tech told me she didn't see anything wrong with her heart! She hadn't seen the arrhythmia the entire 2.5 hours she was looking directly at heart rate. I asked her if I could still see the doctor - who would ultimately sign off on the report and I would get the result a few weeks later - before we left so I could rest assured.

The doctor came in and looked at all of the scans. He asked to see a view of something a little longer than one of the scans and then he said "I have no concerns" and I said "but would you tell me if you did??"and he said "no I would just keep it to myself and hope for the best" - point taken! haha

I asked what he thought had happened the day before, why had her heart rate dipped?? Twice? And so drastically? He said "I think your baby moved away from the doppler and it sounded like it dipped"

WHHAATTT?? So, essentially, user error?? My midwife didn't know how to use the doppler and I had 20 hours of panic?? The ultrasound tech even said her heart was so picture perfect she wishes every baby she saw was that healthy!

My monthly check up is today at 2:40 - part of me is slightly worried the doctor will have something else in his report that will scare me. But overall - I am so far unimpressed with the midwives we are using. We decided to use midwives to avoid all of this over testing and unnecessary worry. I am looking into a doula, and maybe looking to move to another care taker. But for now I am rejoicing in the good news from the doctor, enjoying her ever-strengthening kicks, and marveling at her perfect face. God is good and I love this little girl with my whole heart. 

Monday, December 28, 2015

An Update of Sorts.

Well it is no secret I haven't been on this ole blog recently. I was really excited to be an active blogger again once I got pregnant. Well, that didn't happen. Being pregnant is exhausting. But here we go, yet again. I am going to be trying again to be active here. 

So I am going to update everyone on what has happened since my last post.

After my last post we had a normal monthly midwife check up. Since I popped pretty early everyone has been asking me if we are having twins. So I decided to set the record straight and ask my midwife once and for all. She checked my uterus size and her smile faded. She grabbed the doppler and listened around my stomach. She heard a distinct heartbeat on both the right and left side of my uterus. 

Obviously, like a normal person, I freaked out. The earliest we could get into an ultrasound was TWO WEEKS later! Well, that wasn't going to happen. So we found a place in our town that does ultrasound - for entertainment purposes only - and we got in 4 long hours later.

and the verdict was in: THERE'S ONLY ONE BABY! Praise the Good Lord!

 The very, very next day after we told our family the good news about the gender of our baby, we got the worst news of our lives. My precious, perfect, 18 month old nephew suddenly passed away. I think the main reason why I haven't updated this blog is because I just don't know what to say. I don't want to hash out every detail of those days for the world to see, but I can't just go on without acknowledging Tommy. I remember the day he was born I said "this is the best day of my life!" Philip reminded me that our wedding day was the best day of my life, but that day will always be in the top 5.
The long and the short of it is, Tommy had Williams Syndrome and on November 5th, 2015 he went to heaven to be with Jesus and his grandpa. Tommy forever changed me, and everyone who ever met him. He shined pure joy and brightened everyone's day. His favorite word was "hi" and he said it to EVERYONE he met. Tommy didn't know any strangers, just friends he hadn't met yet. I love that little boy, he made me an aunt, and he made me a better person.
When we told our family we were pregnant we got to up Up North to our family cottage and spend an amazing weekend together. I will always cherish that weekend, not only because we told our family about our baby but because I got SO many snuggles, Hi's, hugs, laughs, and memories with Tommy.


As much as my heartaches and I can't imagine what my life could possibly look like from here on out - I am so grateful that our precious baby is on the way. Philip and I are so excited about the future, and we are just honored and blown away that our baby has the same due date that Tommy had. And so, I will move on with this blog post as I move on each day, looking forward to the future but so glad for the memories. 

At our ultrasound we found out the gender of our baby - and we found out we are having a GIRL!! I could have bet money that we were having a boy. But the tech said "it's a little girl" my mouth dropped open, and I was speechless. "I was terrible to my mother as a teenager"  were the first words out of my mouth. Then I cried.  ha. 

I couldn't be happier about having a girl now! Our poor bank account has already seen the affects of having a girl. 
 Well, I think I am going to end this post here. Crazy news, devastating news, and good news. It's been a whirlwind but I am back on the blog - as much as I can help it!

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Kona - is becoming a big sister

 Hello, my non furry friends! As you all probably know, my mom is having a baby! Blah Blah Blah, yada, yada, yada! That thing is all I hear about!! The baby did this, the baby did that. What will we call it? Where will it sleep? It is getting old! I just wish they would focus on my needs more, again. What do I want to eat? Where do I sleep?

Speaking of sleep, this human child is already getting in the way of my happiness. I love sleeping by my mom's stomach. OK, fine, I will admit it, I like to sleep there because I feel protective over the little thing. However, lately, mom has been using a pillow on her stomach. The pillow blocks me from my position as Guardian Of The Bump! Sometimes I take matters into my own paws and burrow my way between the disgraceful pillow and my human.

Mom has been really tired lately. We used to play for hours. Now I have to bark at her to get her to notice I am even in the room. 

 My favorite times with my mom are when she comes home from lunch. I climb up on her lap and we just chill for about 15 minutes. I really love these times. Even though my mom's lap is slowly disappearing. I've been trying to come up with a nice way to tell my mom that she is really packing on the pounds. Everything is going right to get gut, and that is my space!

 Mom promises me, and sometimes almost cries when we talk about it, that she will still love me. She said love is meant to be multiplied not divided. I told her she needs to stop watching Sister Wives and take me for a D A M N walk!!
 The best part is, Mom goes to bed at 8:30 or 9:00 and dad and I stay up late together! Some Daddy-Daughter bonding time. We play tug of war, PS4, and I clean out his ears sometimes. I'll admit, Mom growing me a person isn't all that bad! As long as they remember their first love and priority, me. No matter how cute that naked alien thing ends up being. And they such better teach it who is the real boss in this house and how to play catch!!!

Thanks for reading! I am working on being more consistent. BUT lets be honest my life is boring!

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Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Baby P// Week 14 & 15

We're just skipping over week 13. I couldn't get a good picture. Here is week 14's picture:

Here is week 15's update. 
Week: F I F T E E N 
Baby is as big as an: Avocado 
What is going on in the womb: Baby P is squirming around, all of his/her joints can move, and s/he might even be doing cute wittle hiccups! 
How is Mom? I am doing so much better! The second trimester is where it is at, man! I have more energy, I am not nauseous at all. I am, however, weepy. I sometimes cry and I don't know why. My bump is growing at a fast pace, I am pretty much only in maternity clothes now. 
Cravings or food aversions? Mmm I just have not had an appetite at all. For anything. ever. except ice cream. 
Philip: He is very excited, he has been working hard on finishing the basement so that we can move all of the stuff in the office down there to make room for the baby. He is also so supportive, and so handsome. 
Total Weight Gain: I am up to 7 lbs now!! Makin' gains! (It feels like it's in my belly and face though)
Sleep: Pretty terrible. Sleeping on my side is the worst. My hips are achey and sore. 
Best Moment of the Week: I FELT THE BABY MOVE!! It seems way too early but, at the same time, it was the weirdest gas bubble/flutter/move on a weird diagonal sensation that I have never, ever, ever, ever felt before. I choose to believe it was Baby P!!

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Nursery Inspiration

I am getting suuuper excited to start getting the nursery ready. The current office is where the baby will reside. It is currently a super cool teal-y color. If you look at my bump pics you can sometimes catch a glimpse.

I want the room theme to be Michigan. NOT as in the University of, I am more of a State girl myself. But as in the state of Michigan. Flint, Detroit, maybe some Tigers in there.

As far as colors if it is girl I want to add gold and coral to the teal. Or if it is a boy I would like to add navy and maybe a light green. I am unsure. I would like a dresser/changing table that is a pop of color.... so much to think about

We really need to finish the basement and move the piano out and then it is game on, nursery! 

Here as some visuals of what I am thinking for the nursery I am thinking: 




This is the last week of my 1st trimester!! I am looking really forward to finding out the gender of the baby and having the energy to clean my house again!

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Baby P// Bump Pics 7-12

Here are the bump pics up until now! This is last week of my 1st trimester! I am only posting Tuesday/Thursday for now. So every Tuesday I will post the previous week's update :) 
7 weeks

9 weeks
10 weeks

11 weeks

12 weeks!

Yesterday a stranger asked if I was pregnant! YESSS
Until Thursday my friends.

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Baby P// 6 Weeks

Week: S I X
Baby is as big as a: Sweetpea
What is going on in the womb: Baby P is developing his/her cute wittle face! There is also a little bump but I am 90% sure that is from the mac and cheese and cheeseburgers haha!
How is Mom? This was a surprisingly good week for me. I had a ton of nausea for a few days but it got better toward the weekend. Had some other ehem, digestive issues. I had my first doctor appointment, that was so surreal. Sitting there, alone, with just a sheet over me, it all started to become very real. very, very real. 
Cravings or food aversions? This week I could not get enough mac and cheese. I also really wanted guac and I opened a new package and it was soupy - I dry heaved.
Prayer for baby: Dear Jesus, please let me be a good mom to this baby. Continue to keep baby safe and growing healthy. And please, let his/her entrance into this world be quick and easy :) Amen
Anything else? So I had my first appointment with my doctor this week. But I really do not think I want to have a doctor at my birth. Just a midwife and a doula. Philip and I are meeting with MidMichigan Midwifery in a few weeks. I asked my doctor about working out and as he slammed his fist into his palm he said "I would avoid jet-skiing and horseback riding" Point taken. 

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Baby P // Week 5

There was a bit of confusion last week: I am now 12 weeks along but I had these posts written along the way so I wouldn't forget everything :) 

Week: F I V E
Baby is as big as an: Appleseed
What is going on in the womb: Baby P is forming all the building blocks for the major organs. 
How is Mom? I feel like puking a lot. But it goes away fairly quickly. I got really nauseous at church and had to run and get a bottle of water. My boobs HURT and are all kinds of heavy. Like sometimes I find myself carrying them when no one else is around. Other than that I am basically just exhausted all of the time and I have to pee out of no where really bad. I am so glamourous. 
Cravings or food aversions? I cannot get enough cheeseburgers!!!! Philip had mayo the other day and I started dry heaving, so that's cool. 
Prayer for baby: Praying everything is going great in there, praying s/he makes it full term. 

My Dearest Appleseed,
I love you so much. You are so tiny but you are having a large effect on me already. You appear to really, really enjoy cheeseburgers. Turns out you hate when Philip (you shall refer to him as father) eats mayo...I hope and pray I am a good mom for you. Keep growing strong and I will do my best to eat good stuff for ya and keep you safe.
Mary. But you can call me Mother Mary.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Baby P // week 4

So, this is weird. I have been dreaming, planning, and wishing for these posts for all long as I can remember. It's super weird to actually be doing one. 
Week: F O U R
Baby is as big as a: poppy seed, aka TEENSY TINY
What is going on in the womb: The primitive placenta is also made up of two layers at this point. Its cells are tunneling into the lining of my uterus, creating spaces for your blood to flow so that the developed placenta will be able to provide nutrients and oxygen to my growing baby when it starts to function at the end of this week. (source)
How is Mom? Little bit of nausea in the morning and my boobs are getting heavier and more sensitive every day, if Kona jumps on them one more time... Also I am a little more weepy than usual. I sobbed when Philip left for camp. Sobbed. Lastly, I am tired most of the time.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Finding out...THAT I AM PREGO!

You may or may not want to know the full story, with the weeks leading up to finding out, if you do, read on; if not, go ahead and skip down a bit and hop back in. 

Philip and I had been going back and forth about when we wanted to try and start a family. We have moved it back and forth several times but the deadline always seem to come up too fast. All that to say we were very much trying to reproduce. So I hoped everyday that I was pregnant but it was too soon to tell. We went to a wedding on August 1st and I thought I might be pregnant but I hadn't taken a positive test yet. I decided to get a glass of wine but I took one sip and couldn't finish the glass, just in case. 

The next day I came home from church and took my last test, a clear blue, a didn't have the box anymore so I didn't have instructions. So when I got 2 lines I started freaking out, I walked outside and showed Philip, we were both so excited. But I knew it was early and I had to be sure. So I googled "clear blue 3 weeks" turns out, you need a PLUS sign not just too lines. So I was a little devastated. 

Fast forward to Thursday, I took another test and I got the faiiiinest line. I ran out and showed Philip and he said "I think that's pretty clear" 
Philip and I were 99% sure I was pregnant and we were so so excited but skeptical somewhat. We went to a Tiger's game that day with Philip's dad and cousin - and I was pretty much bursting at the seams. We wanted a picture of Baby's First Tiger's Game. We didn't get one at the game of baby, but we got this one at dinner. 

The next morning I took a Clear Blue Digital test. LONGEST 2 minutes of my life so far. And then all of a sudden "Pregnant" HO-LY. CRAP!

I ran into our room where Philip was still fast asleep and I said "THIS ONE SAYS PREGNANT!" Philip: rolls over "it does?"
Me: and this one is digital!
Philip: "I knew it! My baby is havin' a baby"

Over the next few days, and really even today, I will randomly stop and go "whoa, I am going to actually give birth" But Philip and I are so excited! We can't wait until I start showing.

I am due, as of right now, April 15th! At time of writing I am 5 weeks and 2 days, we love our little Appleseed and we can't wait to meet him/her.