Wednesday, November 19, 2014

The Fruit of The Spirit Series: Joy


Hello everyone! Day 2 in The Fruit Of The Spirit Series is here! Today our guest poster is Stephanie from the Just A Little Bit Louder Blog! I "met" Stephanie just a few weeks ago but she has quickly become one of my favorite people! She is from The Northwest and is a Children & Youth Pastor. So basically she has super incredible patience and a huge heart! Plus she is real, honest, relatable and HILARIOUS! We have so much in common and I am so lucky to know her! PLEASE go check out her blog because she is awesome and I love her so I know you will too!


I tend to think in extremes. When I process any decision, I think of either the ultimate best situation or the absolute worst consequence. Once I made the mistake of teaching the teenage girls at my church to filter all their words through this: “Helpful or Hurtful?” and it ruined all of my fun because I’d say “Ew, you mix your slurpee flavors together? You are a freak of nature.” and one girl, Sarah, looked me straight in the eyes and said “Stephanie. Helpful or hurtful?” Ugh. 

Anyway. I used to think that the opposite of sadness was joy. Like my whole life I thought that if you cried or felt sad or anything, you didn’t have joy. 

When I was 20 I was diagnosed with depression. I reached out to my church and they didn’t have anything to give me except a shrug and a “pray more.” Then they would continue to talk about things like “joy” and “peace” and I’d sit there thinking “what in the freaking heck is wrong with me, and why do I cry every single night instead of being so happy and so cheerful and stuff?” 

And it took me like 7 years to figure it out. Seven years of wondering why God had passed me by when he was distributing joy and gave me a lot of sadness instead. But one day, when I was feeling happy, I started wondering why my happiness would always fade away back into sadness. If that was what joy was, then why did it always go away? I prayed about it for awhile and it hit me like a ton of bricks. 

In all of my sadness, through all of my tears, despite my always-broken heart... I continually turned hopeful eyes towards the Lord, confident of his delight in me. When I looked around at the things of this earth, I would experience temporary, fleeting emotions. Feeling happy or accepted or rejected or alone or unworthy or appreciated. The point is, it was all temporary. Feeling unworthy would fade away when a whole table full of people I admired would laugh at my jokes. Feeling sad faded away when I was happy. 

I’d actually had joy the whole entire time, because in the deepest depths of my sorrow I knew the One to cry out to, the One who was listening and crying for me. Joy wasn’t -and still isn’t- the result of any earthly circumstance. You know when you’re having a rough day and you FEEL overlooked and you FEEL unimportant and you FEEL not good enough, and then you stumble upon a word from God - maybe in a song, maybe through a person, maybe on a piece of paper tucked away in a book... and you close your eyes and breathe deeply the assurance of God’s existence and his love for you? I think that moment is joy. It’s quiet, but it’s constant. It’s unchangeable. It’s untouchable. It’s eternal. 


Thank you so much Stephanie for sharing your thoughts on this subject with us! 
Be sure to check from every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from now until December 5th to keep up with this series!

23 comments:

  1. I am super loving this series, Mary-Keith!!

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  2. I love this. One of the biggest things that I think people struggle with is that a lot of church do thing that anything mental or anything like depression can be solved by just "praying about it" or you're not "doing enough" which isn't always true. Yes God can heal you and God can do amazing and incredible things, but sometimes the cure isn't just "pray about it" sometimes you really need a doctors help.

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  3. Oh mercy... having suffered & still suffering from depression I so love this post. JOY is always there, even when its hard & it feels like its not...

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  4. Oh my goodness I just want to give Stephanie a big hug now. Talking about depression definitely isn't the easiest, esp when it's you. Joy is always there, but it may not be the easiest to see or feel. Just remember you are loved. I'm glad you found that it's eternal. <3 I'm loving this series, Mary-Keith!

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  5. i LOVE this series, Mary-Keith! It's hard to find the joy when we aren't feeling our best. Stephanie--thank you so much for sharing, I know God is using you to speak to someone!

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  6. These posts are so great. First off I love the ' helpful or hurtful' such wisdom, also it's so true about joy..it's the little momemts when we least expect it.

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  7. I am glad you are enjoying these posts! :) I think Stephanie did such a great job giving information on this topic!

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  8. Thank you Sarah! I think Stephanie did SUCH an amazing job!

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  9. I am so glad you are enjoying this series! I think Stephanie explained it so beautifully!

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  10. Thank you Britt!! :) I think it's going quite well

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  11. amen! I have been through depression, too! I think we need to be sensitive to the fact that sometimes people just need a little bit more to help get through. And God is ok with that!

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  12. so true! Joy is there but it can be So hard!

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  13. Stephanie, I love your thoughts on this! I had a really hard time when I first started walking through infertility. I felt like a terrible Christian for not "feeling" joy through my trial. What was wrong with me? Did I not love God enough? It took me a while to realize that having joy doesn't always mean I'm feeling joyful.

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  14. AMEN! we would never classify physical disease as a spiritual issue, but mental illness DEFINITELY gets treated as such, which isn't fair or healthy!!

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  15. <3 yes! joy is so much more quiet and constant than people tend to give it credit for.

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  16. HUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i RARELY open up about mental illness in public. and thank you - i do so much mental work reminding myself that i am loved and cared about and that a lot of my FEELINGS are lies. i can never trust them! that's why the truths about God are SO IMPORTANT for me to cling to. thank you thank you thank you <3

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  17. you are welcome! and thank you! - i think that's our biggest responsibilities with our hurts and pains… to share our stories and encourage others. <3

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  18. yeah just don't tell teenage girls who will hold you to it, because you will learn it HARD.

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  19. oh sarah, i LOVE this: "having joy doesn't always mean i'm feeling joyful." i think we have to be careful of what we are FEELING - because those things are so temporary and easily influenced, you know? God's got you. i have a special place in my heart for women dealing with infertility issues - one of my closest friends is in the same boat and i am always challenged and encouraged by her faith and trust and encouragement. i pray you are the same for the people in your life.

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  20. Thanks Stephanie--you are so sweet! Infertility is the hardest thing I've ever had to walk through, but after two years I can truly say that I am grateful for it. This trial has brought me so much closer to the Lord and has awakened my dependency and trust in Him. I'll be praying for your friend!

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  21. This is so beautiful. I didn't get a chance to read this until now, but I know why. I didn't need it then like I need it now. Thank you!!!

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  22. I am so glad you found this when you needed it! God Bless!

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